One way to waist a perfectly good day

So our Fed Ex package is suppose to arrive today with all documents that we have to look over and sign. Usually it is early/mid morning when the truck comes through here. I was wanting to take a photo of the guy delivering our package, and I was so scarred that he would come when I took Madilyn to school, so I left a little early, and then hurried straight back home. It is now 1:37, and I have sat in this chair in front of my computer, and right beside the front windows so I could get a good clear view oh, for only about 4 1/2 hours. I only got up to pee, and to fix a sandwich, and to grab two cookies. I have sat and starred at her picture, done research on her orphanage, joined the orphanage yahoo group, emailed, ordered luggage, cyber window shopped for cute baby things, checked RQ's babies post, of course we think ours is the cutest ever! Just as any parent would.
So I'm about at the point where I'm beginning to get really tired of sitting here. I had a good plan for today. I was going to come home after taking Madilyn, be here to get our package, go scan her pictures and make copies, go to the bank

(quickly jump up)
(run to the door, camera in hand)

It's here, I'll be back to finish this post in a little while!

(8 hours later)

Wow, sorry about that!
Anyway, where was I?
Oh well, it doesn't matter now, we have her file!
I opened it with the Fed Ex lady, to show her I was not nuts.
I had raced over and opened the door with my camera, and as soon as she got off the truck, I said, "wait a minute can I take your picture, and then I'll explain"
I didn't want her getting too close, anyway I told her that my baby was in that envelope. She looked as if she was about to turn and jump back in the truck. So I yelled out that we were adopting from China, and our baby's info is in there. So I took the picture
(she posed perfectly)



















and then I opened it, and showed her the pics.
By the way, Oh my, how can she get any cuter than the pictures on the screen. They are so much better in person!
So I started to read through the documents, and my heart broke. On the very first page, in the very first sentence it lists were she was found. I'm not going to list the info here, just for privacy reasons, but I was just not expecting that to be the first thing I read. Then it states the date that she was found. My baby girl was only 4 days old. She was a tiny thing weighing only 5.5 pounds. :(
What was I expecting? I knew her story would make me sad, but it makes me more than that, it makes me want to jump on a plane and go get her right this second.
It also makes me wonder how on this earth could somebody leave a tiny baby like that. I know I couldn't! But then again, I don't live in the same kind of world, with the same kind of beliefs that someone who could do that does.
I often wondered and worried about how I would feel toward this baby. Even before I met her. I worried that I wouldn't be able to get attached to her, or that I may not bond with her, I'm sure everybody who has adopted somewhat worried about that.
But I don't have those fears anymore. I've looked at referral pictures of babies for over four years now, and I did not expect to get attached to her just with a picture. But it has happened, she is MY LITTLE GIRL! I study her face, her tiny fingers and toes. I wonder what goes on in her little mind.
Oh, I can not wait to kiss those cheeks, to feel her soft little head.

We have signed all the paperwork, and I will try my best to send it off to our agency tomorrow.

It's getting late, and I wanted to post "The Call" video, but it will have to wait till tomorrow, if I can wait, y'all can too!